There are so many truths in this Jana that are so important! It reminds me of that old saying, "We make plans, and god laughs."
I think regular reflection & checking in with how your values have changed is part of being human -- but not something talked about or valued in our culture. Thanks for writing this:)
Thank you, Jen. You're 100% right with value shifts! I agree. Any “major change” can shift and rearrange values, even redundant some 😊 thank you for sharing 💕
I was never good at the 5 year plan because I’ve always felt quite directionless, I think because work I’ve not had a career, just jobs. And yes it’s always changing & evolving - I like what you say about clutching to something which then stops you from doing anything else - it’s so true. Thank Jana
Thank you, Han. I think you got it right; jobs are often more freeing than careers. And many of us like to clutch to the known to avoid discomfort 🫣 thank you for sharing 💕
I did a 5 year-ish plan. Years ago. Lucked out and met my mentor who shared what worked for him. He was a self-made entrepreneur, a man of many hats. He owned a Cajun restaurant at the time in NorCal. My husband was redoing our kitchen and on weekends we’d go to his restaurant. We all took to each other. We’d arrive as they were preparing to open and sit with him while he told us to write down and sign our goals. It worked for us. We escaped corporate SanFran world and moved to southern Mexico where we built a house and opened a bookstore. I will always thank Don for pointing us in right direction.
Oh, wow, well that is amazing story of pivoting! Thank you for sharing. Owning a bookstore sounds like a dream 😊 I wonder if you could share more about the process that worked for you. Is there anything specific that made a huge difference and allowed both of you to pivot?
If you don't mind, I'll add a link to one of my chapters from my memoir, Where the Sky is Born: Living in the Land of the Maya here. I've condensed the memoir and am serializing on my stack: Mexico Soul. Here's Chap. 17, Tales from the Yucatán, which tells how we first got interested in the process of owning a bookstore. And if anyone wants to follow along, please see Mexico Soul. This Friday will be chapter 22, and previous chapters are available on my site. Tales from the Yucatán https://mexicosoul.substack.com/p/tales-from-the-yucatan
This line really struck me: 'What if the benchmarks we've been chasing were never really ours to begin with?' It's such a powerful question. It makes me wonder, how much of our 'success' is truly our definition of success, and how much is inherited from external expectations? How do we uncover what truly matters to us? AHHHHHH. Haha. Thanks for sharing such a thoughtful article.
You're most welcome, Alexander. And thank you for your input. You're very right there; often, the definition of success is inherited, and a lot of it comes from external expectations. It reminded me of how at work, when my colleagues get a promotion or new job, I catch myself thinking, "I should have gone for this position", or "I should look around at the job market". So, I have to remind myself consistently what the end goal is for me. Thank you for engaging; it means a lot.
Great post. I can absolutely relate to feeling like I’ve walked through the wrong door. I also liken that feeling to the day my parents dropped me off at a YMCA alone when I was 5 and I felt like they were never coming back. No judgement on my parents please. It was a different time in the 1800s when I was 5.
I’m absolutely in sync with you on this and how things have changed.
Anyway, I think we traded ideas on some books, including Seth Godin. Yesterday I watched a YouTube of Marie Florio and Seth Godin regarding his new book that is also along these lines. I think you might like this. Speed it up to 1.50 though, he’s a slow talker.
Totally fine to just listen, there’s really nothing to see. Link below.
I feel seen! I was always so ambitious and then in my early 40s I felt like I’d lost that ambition. After some time though, I realized I was still ambitious but my definition of success had changed and it wasn’t about climbing the corporate ladder. Thank you for articulating this so well!
This is such a great post and I can totally resonate with the idea that our goals and definitions of success can change so dramatically over quite a short period of time. I have a hard enough time setting six months to a year goals, never mind 5 years 🤣
The journey is so relatable. I had my fair share of experimenting and have finally come to the writing by world as my final refuge. Thanks for writing this and giving me a sigh of relief. 🥲
One of the best things I ever learned -- and I try to remember -- is that setting goals can actually hinder our growth. If we hold too hard to a goal or original plan/vision, what possibilties and evolutions are we cutting off? I like to use the idea of setting intention, rather than goals, with myself and my clients and I focus on the question: How do I want to feel, doing the work?
This was a necessary read for me this morning. and a calling back to myself and my center Thank you Jana and the Coffee Break Newsletter. <3
So true! I used to be a big advocate for goals; for sure, it's better to set direction than wander aimlessly. But, like you, eventually, you realise that goals might start going against you. In terms of how you feel. Once they start putting a lot of pressure on you, this is where they begin hindering growth, as you said, as opposed to helping thrive.
Thank you for sharing, Sadie. Your input means a lot!
Couldn’t agree more. The obsession with constant acceleration isn’t just exhausting; it’s downright limiting. We’ve been sold this idea that success is a straight, upward climb, when in reality, growth often looks like a zigzag—sometimes even a full-on retreat before the next step forward. Herminia Ibarra’s insight on seeing our careers as “experiments in becoming” is a powerful reminder that evolving isn’t failing; it’s thriving.
For me, I had to let go of the plan that staying on a single career path was the only way to make an impact. Letting go of that gave me the freedom to create HERE—a space where I can dig deeper, challenge more, and reach others in ways I never could before.
Oh, I love this part: "growth often looks like a zigzag—sometimes even a full-on retreat before the next step forward", and "evolving isn’t failing; it’s thriving"
Thank you for sharing.
I am so glad you were able to let go and create a space of freedom for yourself. If you wrote about it, please share it here. I'd love to learn more about your journey.
I haven’t written more about my journey just yet, but your encouragement means a lot and might just inspire me to dive deeper. I’ll definitely share if I do! Thanks again for your support.
omg so much truth in this! I have changed my mind on so many things the last few years but the work towards meaningful work for me has remained the same. Excited to see where this takes you!
What I found was that what I did that mattered was because of who I am. It was not because I was defined by what I did, i.e. work, in spite of labels that described functions - teacher, professor, coach, consultant, designer, etc. I do what I am, not I am what I do. The good work was beyond the name. The work was what I cared about, the name was mostly a convenience for others.
Resonate with a lot of this Jana. Think I may be in (another) pivot point myself and working out where I want to go. Equal parts exciting, liberating and anxiety inducing!
Loved this, Jana. Sometimes, all we need to find the right path is to turn our heads a little so we see things from a slightly different angle. We seem to get caught up in standard labels and job descriptions, but there really aren't any rules. We can adapt and mash-up our skills and ideas any way we want. That's an exciting prospect!
Such exciting prospect. There's something about taking that power back, right. Sometimes, I wish I had this realisation a way earlier, but I guess, we have to travel the path to get to the right point of space and time.
There are so many truths in this Jana that are so important! It reminds me of that old saying, "We make plans, and god laughs."
I think regular reflection & checking in with how your values have changed is part of being human -- but not something talked about or valued in our culture. Thanks for writing this:)
Thank you, Jen. You're 100% right with value shifts! I agree. Any “major change” can shift and rearrange values, even redundant some 😊 thank you for sharing 💕
I was never good at the 5 year plan because I’ve always felt quite directionless, I think because work I’ve not had a career, just jobs. And yes it’s always changing & evolving - I like what you say about clutching to something which then stops you from doing anything else - it’s so true. Thank Jana
Thank you, Han. I think you got it right; jobs are often more freeing than careers. And many of us like to clutch to the known to avoid discomfort 🫣 thank you for sharing 💕
I did a 5 year-ish plan. Years ago. Lucked out and met my mentor who shared what worked for him. He was a self-made entrepreneur, a man of many hats. He owned a Cajun restaurant at the time in NorCal. My husband was redoing our kitchen and on weekends we’d go to his restaurant. We all took to each other. We’d arrive as they were preparing to open and sit with him while he told us to write down and sign our goals. It worked for us. We escaped corporate SanFran world and moved to southern Mexico where we built a house and opened a bookstore. I will always thank Don for pointing us in right direction.
Oh, wow, well that is amazing story of pivoting! Thank you for sharing. Owning a bookstore sounds like a dream 😊 I wonder if you could share more about the process that worked for you. Is there anything specific that made a huge difference and allowed both of you to pivot?
If you don't mind, I'll add a link to one of my chapters from my memoir, Where the Sky is Born: Living in the Land of the Maya here. I've condensed the memoir and am serializing on my stack: Mexico Soul. Here's Chap. 17, Tales from the Yucatán, which tells how we first got interested in the process of owning a bookstore. And if anyone wants to follow along, please see Mexico Soul. This Friday will be chapter 22, and previous chapters are available on my site. Tales from the Yucatán https://mexicosoul.substack.com/p/tales-from-the-yucatan
That's so amazing! I think committing to a dream and the plan for it is so so key :)
True! You'll enjoy my link to Chap 17 of my memoir on how we founded the bookstore in southern Mexico.
This line really struck me: 'What if the benchmarks we've been chasing were never really ours to begin with?' It's such a powerful question. It makes me wonder, how much of our 'success' is truly our definition of success, and how much is inherited from external expectations? How do we uncover what truly matters to us? AHHHHHH. Haha. Thanks for sharing such a thoughtful article.
You're most welcome, Alexander. And thank you for your input. You're very right there; often, the definition of success is inherited, and a lot of it comes from external expectations. It reminded me of how at work, when my colleagues get a promotion or new job, I catch myself thinking, "I should have gone for this position", or "I should look around at the job market". So, I have to remind myself consistently what the end goal is for me. Thank you for engaging; it means a lot.
Great post. I can absolutely relate to feeling like I’ve walked through the wrong door. I also liken that feeling to the day my parents dropped me off at a YMCA alone when I was 5 and I felt like they were never coming back. No judgement on my parents please. It was a different time in the 1800s when I was 5.
I’m absolutely in sync with you on this and how things have changed.
Anyway, I think we traded ideas on some books, including Seth Godin. Yesterday I watched a YouTube of Marie Florio and Seth Godin regarding his new book that is also along these lines. I think you might like this. Speed it up to 1.50 though, he’s a slow talker.
Totally fine to just listen, there’s really nothing to see. Link below.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=JGgLBuxD_pw
Wow! Thank you, Renee. That means a lot. I'm so glad it resonated.
Oh, yes, we connected over Marie Forleo ad Seth Godin a while back 😊
Ooh, thank you or recommendation, I will put it on with my morning coffee 🙏
I'm totally onboard with this line of thinking! 👏
I must admit I do enjoy a fresh challenge, a blank sheet of paper, an empty spreadsheet waiting for the numbers to grow. 🥰
I'm glad to hear that! Challenge on, Kate! 👏❤️
👏 🎉
I feel seen! I was always so ambitious and then in my early 40s I felt like I’d lost that ambition. After some time though, I realized I was still ambitious but my definition of success had changed and it wasn’t about climbing the corporate ladder. Thank you for articulating this so well!
Oh, wow I'm so glad to hear that, Karen! I think 40s that pivoting age.
I can relate to to this soooooo much.
This is such a great post and I can totally resonate with the idea that our goals and definitions of success can change so dramatically over quite a short period of time. I have a hard enough time setting six months to a year goals, never mind 5 years 🤣
Thank you, Louise, that means so much 😊 I think, your way makes a lot of sense. Six months is reasonable, right
Definitely. It's more than enough 🤣
The journey is so relatable. I had my fair share of experimenting and have finally come to the writing by world as my final refuge. Thanks for writing this and giving me a sigh of relief. 🥲
You're most welcome, Femy. I am glad you enjoyed the read and found your way to writing.
One of the best things I ever learned -- and I try to remember -- is that setting goals can actually hinder our growth. If we hold too hard to a goal or original plan/vision, what possibilties and evolutions are we cutting off? I like to use the idea of setting intention, rather than goals, with myself and my clients and I focus on the question: How do I want to feel, doing the work?
This was a necessary read for me this morning. and a calling back to myself and my center Thank you Jana and the Coffee Break Newsletter. <3
So true! I used to be a big advocate for goals; for sure, it's better to set direction than wander aimlessly. But, like you, eventually, you realise that goals might start going against you. In terms of how you feel. Once they start putting a lot of pressure on you, this is where they begin hindering growth, as you said, as opposed to helping thrive.
Thank you for sharing, Sadie. Your input means a lot!
Couldn’t agree more. The obsession with constant acceleration isn’t just exhausting; it’s downright limiting. We’ve been sold this idea that success is a straight, upward climb, when in reality, growth often looks like a zigzag—sometimes even a full-on retreat before the next step forward. Herminia Ibarra’s insight on seeing our careers as “experiments in becoming” is a powerful reminder that evolving isn’t failing; it’s thriving.
For me, I had to let go of the plan that staying on a single career path was the only way to make an impact. Letting go of that gave me the freedom to create HERE—a space where I can dig deeper, challenge more, and reach others in ways I never could before.
Oh, I love this part: "growth often looks like a zigzag—sometimes even a full-on retreat before the next step forward", and "evolving isn’t failing; it’s thriving"
Thank you for sharing.
I am so glad you were able to let go and create a space of freedom for yourself. If you wrote about it, please share it here. I'd love to learn more about your journey.
I haven’t written more about my journey just yet, but your encouragement means a lot and might just inspire me to dive deeper. I’ll definitely share if I do! Thanks again for your support.
omg so much truth in this! I have changed my mind on so many things the last few years but the work towards meaningful work for me has remained the same. Excited to see where this takes you!
I'm so glad to hear that, Sarah.
Love this post Jana. Particularly what you said about defining success. It's amazing how over time our definitions of success change.
Wow! Thank you, Debbie! That means a lot. Thank you for sharing
What I found was that what I did that mattered was because of who I am. It was not because I was defined by what I did, i.e. work, in spite of labels that described functions - teacher, professor, coach, consultant, designer, etc. I do what I am, not I am what I do. The good work was beyond the name. The work was what I cared about, the name was mostly a convenience for others.
Thank you for sharing. 100% we should not attach the whole identity to ‘job title’. “I do what I am, not I am what I do”—I love this!
Resonate with a lot of this Jana. Think I may be in (another) pivot point myself and working out where I want to go. Equal parts exciting, liberating and anxiety inducing!
And congrats on turning on paid 👏👏👏👏
Thank you, Lucy, for sharing. Do you want to share about the pivot? I'd love to hear more.
Loved this, Jana. Sometimes, all we need to find the right path is to turn our heads a little so we see things from a slightly different angle. We seem to get caught up in standard labels and job descriptions, but there really aren't any rules. We can adapt and mash-up our skills and ideas any way we want. That's an exciting prospect!
Such exciting prospect. There's something about taking that power back, right. Sometimes, I wish I had this realisation a way earlier, but I guess, we have to travel the path to get to the right point of space and time.
Thank you for sharing.
PS - Congrats on turning on paid! ;)
Thank you, it was a terrifying step.